On many occasions I've been asked by teachers and students to
recommend materials for pronunciation practice. I've rather despised
most of the feeble sentences I've seen offered in textbooks for such
purposes which packed in a large number of words containing a
particular sound but were completely boring and silly, like the ghastly
"rain in Spain falls mainly in the plain".
Some books have offered as such materials light verses or
nursery
rhymes but the latter especially have very often the disadvantage of
incorporating archaic or other unusual words, senses or grammatical
features or requiring abnormal pronunciations to make them rhyme or
scan.
The reading well of serious verse is an extremely difficult
thing to
achieve as witness the very few even very highly educated native
speakers of English who can manage to do so with success. It is
notorious that the authors of much respected verse very often read
aloud their own work quite badly.
Very few EFL students should ever be encouraged to attempt to
read
aloud
serious verse. On the other hand non-serious verse which has been
written with the sort of excessive rhythmic regularity which thereby
makes it bad as poetry can, I believe, be put to good use for the
encouragement of those who might benefit from practising material which
embodies English typical conversational rhythms.
With this in mind I produced numbers of limericks for rhythm
practice including a dozen or so which can be used to focus at the same
time on certain vowel contrasts that many EFL learners need to
cultivate. I shall give some of them below after a brief note on the
limerick form.
A limerick consists of a five-line stanza with, in all,
thirteen
stresses. The first two lines constitute a rhyming couplet with three
stresses in each of its lines. The two lines which follow it are also a
rhyming couplet but with only two stresses in each. The final clinching
line matches the first in number of stresses and also rhymes with it.
The rhyme scheme is thus aa bb a.
The best examples of the form may additionally incorporate
further
internal rhymes but these are not necessary defining features. The
typical content of a limerick is a potted story about a person who is
indicated at the beginning of its first line and usually accorded a
geographical attribution at the end of that line. Some limericks may
incorporate puns and many have
tended to be at least slightly improper as, you are cautioned, will be
evidenced below.
Some limericks for pronunciation practice:
Note that in the following first 13 limericks a first
vowel-type
occurs as at least every stressed vowel in the longer lines viz numbers
1, 2 and 5, and that at least every stressed vowel in the shorter lines
viz numbers 3 and 4 is a similar vowel often confused with it by EFL
learners. The seven remaining ones are offered for rhythm practice
alone.
1) Vowel of see
versus that of sit
A teacher called Steven from Leeds
Eats each meal with a teaspoon of seeds.
Lilies cling to his skin,
Thickets spring from his chin,
And his knees are in leaf with green weeds.
2) Vowel of ash
versus that of bed
That mad actor, Max Hackney-Pratts
Gathered masses and masses of hats,
Kept a set in his bed,
Twenty-seven on his head
And the balance on black plastic mats.
3) Vowel of ash
versus that of bed
That fat black cat Nat from Rabat
Sat passively flat on his mat.
He never got wet
Except for a bet
And it had to be massive at that.
4) Vowel of hot
versus that of saw
Sonia Hotckiss-Knotts
Makes constant blots and spots.
As she ought, of course
She feels awful remorse
But she'll obviously make blots till she rots.
5) Vowel of too
versus that of foot
A foodie called Judy MacBruce
Found a use for the juice from a goose.
She took a good look
At a cookery book
And produced a quite beautiful goose mousse.
6) Vowel of too
versus that of foot
A foolish group tutor called Jude
When rebuked for being stupidly rude
Said "I could - p'r'aps I should -
Be fulsomely good
But I'd sooner be brutishly crude".
7) Vowel of cup
versus that of ash
A young girl called Buttercup Rust
With a stunningly up-thrusting bust
Rendered masses of chaps
Quite apt to collapse
Overcome with ungovernable lust.
8) Vowel of burn
versus that of hair
Said a perky old nursemaid from Durban,
Though I'm certainly firmly suburban,
Yet I wear round my hair
— People stare, I don't care —
These pearls and this purple fur turban.
9) Vowel of sit
versus that of see
A citizen of Hitchin called Binks
A little too given to drinks
Would eagerly greet
Folk he'd meet in the street
With sniggers and giggles and winks.
10) Vowel of ash
versus that of bed
A laddie named Nash from Saltash
Was fantastic'ly rash with his cash
He lent and he spent
So it very soon went
And wham, in a flash came the crash.
11) Vowel of bed
versus that of sit
Benjamin Gregory Berry
Never drinks red wine or sherry
But giving him whisky
Is a little bit risky:
He tends to get terribly merry!
12) Vowel of arm
versus that of cup
Her aunt and her father and Barbara
Were ardently partial to Scarborough
But her uncle and mother
And cousins and brother
Would rather by far Market Harborough.
13) Vowel of hot
versus that of saw
A hot-blooded novice at John's
Was erotic'ly fondling the swans
When "Make sport with my daughter"
Said a hoary old porter
"But the swans are not on - they're the dons'."
14)
A glutt'nous old chap from Madrid
Would eat masses and masses of kid
He "rammed" down his throat
Such amounts of young goat
That folk said that he'd choke — and he did.
15)
An EFL teacher in Asturias
Claimed qualifications that were spurious.
But I say what the hell
He taught perfectly well
And his lessons were no way injurious.
16)
An amorous couple in Spain
Set about making love on a train
But their pleasure was marred
Coz a tiresome guard,
When they wouldn't refrain, pulled the chain.
17)
The impulse to rhyme should not please
It's never a breeze or a wheeze.
In fact it's quite plain
That it causes much pain.
It's really a dreadful disease!
18)
A limerick writer one day
Confessed he was oft led astray:
"I prefer my verse clean
But the rhymes come obscene
And elbow the clean lines away".
19)
When it comes to my verse writing crimes,
Well, it's limericks I do the most times:
They soon come to an end
And their subjects depend
On the stocks of available rhymes.
20)
A fellow called Denis of Venice
Would refuse girls' requests to play tennis
But their suggesting the Lido
Would rouse his libido
And make Venice Denis a menace.
ə 'lædi neɪmd `næʃ frm sɒltˋˏæʃ
wz fæn`tæstɪkli ˋˏræʃ│wɪð ɪz
`kæʃ
hi `lent ən i `spent
səʊ ɪt `veri suːn ˋˏwent
ən `wæm! ɪn ə ˋˏflæʃ │keɪm ðə
`kræʃ./
(11)
'benʤəmɪn 'gregəri ˏberi
'nevə drɪŋks red ˋˏwaɪn ˈɔː ˎʃeri
bət ˋgɪvɪŋ ɪm ˋˏwɪski
ɪz ə 'lɪtl bɪt ˋrɪski
hi ˋˏtendz │tə get ˋˏterəbli `meri./
(12)
hər ˋɑːnt│ən ɜː ˋˏfɑːðər ən ˋˏbɑːbrə
wər ˋˏɑːdntli `ˏpɑːʃl tə `skɑːbrə
bət ɜːr ˋʌŋkl ən ˋˏmʌðə
ən `kʌznz n ˋˏbrʌðə
wʊd `rɑːðə baɪ ˋˏfɑː│mɑːkɪt `hɑːbrə./